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June 4th
"Insecure.org - UnixWars" heheh.. *nix fans read ahead.. anyone else might not get the references..
Sent in by: Ellis_Dee
"Licensing Time Bomb" hehe, 'Renting' Software.. neato idea, cept i dont like that whole 'repossession' factor.. infact, i would kick some sersious ass if Microsoft repossessed my OS cuz i missed a payment.. oh well.. this will just put more preasure on independant groups to put out good FREE software.. or a lifetime license..
Sent in by: Toool
"The Original Joe Forman Micro Gerbil" bawhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahah more flash! bhahhwhahhahahahahahah
Sent in by: ???? uhm i closed the window before i pasted the name. im gay
"Feer my skilz(jpg)" rofl! click it..
Local copy here
Sent in by: Wolf-

 
June 4th
"Laws of Anime" hehe, all you Japanimation fans out there will laugh yer ass off, cuz its all true. infact, like 80% of these are visible in any Japanime flic.. heres some paste to go with your circle of paper :)..
#6 - Law of Temporal Variability Time is not a constant. Time stops for the hero whenever he does something 'cool' or 'impressive'. Time slows down when friends and lovers are being killed and speeds up whenever there is a fight.
#7 - First Law of Temporal Mortality 'Good Guys' and 'Bad Guys' both die in one of two ways - either so quick they don't even see it coming, OR it's a long drawn out affair where the character gains much insight to the workings of society, human existence or why the toast always lands butter side down.
Sent in by: Myth2
"Special Report - Starwars Personality quiz" alright, true starwars geeks will get off on this.. you answer 44 questions regarding your personality, and hit the big 'submit' button, and it calculates your personality and compares it to a character from starwars, ie, this is my result..
OBI-WAN KENOBI
No, not the brash, young Jedi currently on screen, but Alec Guiness' wise hermit of the Classic Trilogy. You are a quietly graceful leader who people seek out. You may have fallen from grace, perhaps had power usurped by young upstarts, but the right people know you are on the mark.
Sent in by: Dragn
"Yahoo - Sleepwalking, Sleepkilling?" if this guy 'gets off' i gotta sleep more.. well, i gotta sleep kill everyone i graduated with :).. anyway, apparently this guy was asleep, and killed his wife.. Now this wasn't a simple 'smothering' like rolling over on yer with a pillow between you, this was a "lemme goto the kitchen and grab a big knife, then head back to the beadroom, stab her 44 times, and take yer bleeding body and throw it into the pool, all while hiding evidence.." wow, that much coordination while asleep. thats talent..
"AltMedia - May the underpants be with you" hehe, follow up on the "phrases from starwars with words switch to 'pants'"...

 
June 3rd
"AOL Aquires Leading Internet Music Companies" wow, guess whats gonna be gay by the next version? lemme think.. Winamp, Shoutcast, and whatever proggy Spinner.com does.. this is just like AOL, "Hey since all our services suck, lets buy something good, and turn it into ass.. so it fits our image".. im so waiting for like Microsoft to buy AOL, so that there can be a black hole consisting entirely lameness.. hrmm. MSAOL!@ it even looks good when typed!@#!# oh well. a-gay!
"CNN - Clinton to order Youth Violence Study" i can already read what the final report shall say... "the source of all Youth Violence stems around computers.. Computers are totally to blame, oh and so are black trenchcoats, and guns.. but Trenchcoats more importantly then guns".. oh well, its hardly worth the click...
"Lamers Transport(jpeg)" k, i dont really have a discription for this, except.. "Now i know how lamers get to places.."
Local copy here
Sent in by: Madhouse

"Buy.com - 10$ Coupon" all you buy.com junkies out there, click this link, and add it to your basket, its 10$ off any purchase of 10+$.. now i choose not to use it, cuz by the time it cleared to border and stuff, it would cost me like 30$ for a 1$ package.. oh well.. you americans will enjoy it..
Sent in by: Mr_Kablam
"Yoda Milk (jpeg)" ehhe.. you guessed it..
Local copy here
Sent in by: quanja

 
June 2nd
"Excite - NZ Censors struggle to master computer games" well, it looks like the kiwi government is trying to crack down on sex and violence in video games.. whats next? Australia trying to censor pr0n?.. oh wait, that is actually happening.. All i can say is, I'm glad i live in a semi free country, where the only stuff thats censored is the media.. (like thats a great feat or something, Media is the only real thing you can NEVER trust these days.)
"C|Net - Power line, future of Broadband?" wow, fuck this Cable Modem shit, gimme some of this lovin.. and Internet backbone through your existing Power Lines (uhm you know the big fat lines outside yer house that deliver power to ya, thats what im talking about)..
In discussions with financial backers and potential political supporters, the company has said individual consumers could get network connections of 2.5 gigabits per second--an estimate the company calls highly conservative.
That's not quite an exobit. But even at that speed, one could have high-quality, real-time videoconferencing or easily watch a movie downloaded from the Net.
uhm k, someone correct my math if im wrong, but thats like 312megs/s which would totally kaq out 80% of all house Harddrives..
"John Carmack's Plan - On Crack" heh, more javascript fun.. i'd paste what i got, but its HUGE (all the ladies say that about me, infact, their thinking about adding my manhood to the Nation Anthem..)..
"Mr. T versus Everything" hehe. its exactly what it claims to be.. my favorite hero (pending Major Falcon's demise in G.I.Joe) of the 80's has come back to 'lay down the smack' on everything thats Holy and Unholy in todays complex; minority rule, life. anyway, its a big list, with TONS of 'blurb/bubble style conversations.
Sent in by: TOoooOOoOoOoOOoOOl (he's got more 'O's then yermother eating box of Cheerios)
 
June 1st
"A guide to Star Wars Lightsabers" a literal "Who's who?" on lightsabers... ya, only geeks will click this link, and then commence to download the sound file of the Lightsaber lighting :)..
"Blizzard.nu/lol" sorry for the raw dir listing, but theres too much neato stuff for me just to link one of them. check it, its pretty cool :).. specially the eyetest, and uhm the microsoft one.. *shutter*..
Sent in by: Psychic
"Mang.net - Barney(jpeg)" hehehe.. this is funny for so many reasons, so im not gonna ruin it.. (oh, and if you dont get it, go watch hackers, and read the "Hacking Gibson Computers for Dummies" book..
Local copy here
Sent in by: Maddog666

"Dr. Freeze - Total Computer Cooling" alright, this guy is good, but he cheated.. He's using an air conditioner to cool the mineral Oil.. oh well, i'd do it, but i have no desire to submerse my computer in oil :).. but ya, with some innovation, this idea could be 100% successful.. none the less this guy definatly turned over a new leaf with his designs... all the power to him.. (im only jealous that i didn't come up with the idea first).. :)
Sent in by: Tooool
 
May 31th
"MSN - Vanilla Ice is a wuss" hehe. k, im paraphrasing again.. i think im addicted to paraphrasing.. argh.. this is gonna cost me in my psychotherapy sessions.. anyway.. apparantly people actually like Vanilla Ice again.. infact so much so, that they actually goto his concerts (ya, believe it or not, it actually happened).. but ya, one fan jumped on stage and started to kick his ass, so he stopped the show.. what a pansy.. i dunno, im sure he's gay.. (no offence to macho gay people)..
"E!Online - Fan say JarJar Stinks" wow, i can't believe that people NOW are figuring this out.. JarJar == AssAss.. he was prolly only left in the movie; cuz Lucas hates Jamaicans or something.. anyway, you really dont need to read the article, i pretty much just summed it up :)..
"CNN - US company plans to test 'Flying Car'" wow. <insert jetsons here>.. a flying car. Now you'll be able to piss people off in 3D.. just imagine, you'll now have a whole new dimension to cut people off with.. How will the 'blinker' system work? with 4 levers? where will they go? and what kinda blindspot issue would it create?.. "Hey i wanna switch 'lanes' down, uhm WHERES MY FUCKING MIRROR!?!?? anyway it should prove to be neato..
The Batmobile-shaped vehicle will seat four people, do about 5 miles per liter of gas, have a top speed of over 600 mph and will take off and land vertically.
uhm that should read 600kph.. NOT mph.. who ever did this 'copy' is a m0.. but.. after all its only CNN.. :)..
"Star Trek == Satan Trek" rofl!
Are you eager to learn the truth about this diabolic show? Are you a "trekie" (fan) who wants to put his/her life right with God? Are you a Christian who wants to combat the forces of Lucifer?
If you answered YES to any of those questions, then this website is for you! Read on and you will see me expose the truth about the demonic forces at work behind the Star Trek phenomena. You will also learn how to witness the faith to "trekies" and others caught in Satan's web of lies.
Sent in by: Gah! Windows is gay, i lost who sent it in
 
May 30th
"Slate - Racial Stereotypes in SW:EP1" hrmm. this is where i bust out my cloak and white hood.. oh wait.. im nut an ignorant son of a bitz.. I was/will never be a part of the KKK or any other racial bigot group.. anyway.. check it.. but yes. i think the JarJar Bink char. is brutal. i hope he dies. every time i see him on the screen i just wanna kill every jamaican i see. uhm wait, thats not it.. i just wanna kill jarjar.. stupid m0.. (nut ewe, jarjar).. :).
Sent in by: quj
"Techweb - Clinton backs cyber attack" mmm.. hackers for hire. well. .its prolly part of a probation period for like Mitnick or something :). i would suggest i should be apart of that group, but well, im nut a hax0r any more.. bleh.. just read, you american Slime!.. hehe
"Microsoft - Windows 98, are you an idiot?" ok, so i modified the title a bit.. its a gay quiz that my mother could answer regarding windows 98 (whats astonishing about that is, she's used to Windows 3.11).. oh well, needless to say, i passed with 100% right, and i've never even used 98.. EVER!
"Space Moose - Episode I" hehehe. Space Moose oym.. ofcourse, i want the 'dick magnet' t-shirt :). hrmm i think i might just get a couple made up.. they would rule.. hrmm.. oh well, click it, its hilarious in the Space Moose style..
 
May 29th
"Wired - Australia set to bury pr0n" Boi... I'm glad i dont live in the facist nation of australia.. *snicker*.. it looks like they (australian gov't) is trying to remove the freedom of speech, oh wait.. who says australians have that right?.. i dont recall them having a constitution? or even a declarion of independance.. oh well, they're screwed.. its ok though, cuz they're all convicts.. (ok, thats enough australia bashing).. but where else can you find kangaroos and koala's?.. thats what i thought..
"Brunching - Starwars unvieled" Done with your standard Brunching Shuttlecock style.. it rules..

"Burn Bunny" alright, I don't get it.. but its kinda wierd.. but heres what i think is going on, this chick, is all pissy cuz her Rabbit (no phalicies here) uhm, hrmm. what did the rabbit do? maybe uhm, it tried to run away, so she douced it in Lighter Fluid, and burned it!. yeah yeah!.. BURN!
Sent in by: NineSecSR
"Foxnews - Cox, Dicks Urge Tighter Controls On Technology Exports to China" Fuck the article. read the title; its much more entertaining.. bhqhwhhwhahahahahh.. but if you actually plan on reading it, heres some pasties..
"That would be the worst of all possible worlds," Cox told a House International Relations subcommittee, because China would still get the technology but U.S. businesses and workers would be harmed.

 
May 28th
"Geek Gourmet - Geek inspired recipes" hehe.. I fit into this catagory, infact, i should submit some of my recipes.. cept, that they are VERY private.. and some even contain GHB (jk) :).. ohwell read up.. this is how geeks get chicks.. no more trying to 'startrek' a chick into a relation ship.. ( 'startrek' == talking about startrek and how certain female characters would look better in a bikini rather then their restrictive outfits, it never works :)
Sent in by: Hee-la (the man)
"Tigger Pr0n" hehe. i dunno if i posted this awhile ago, but it looks like they've updated it a bit since then.. check it out, its definatly good for a laugh...
Sent in by: Perlandra
"Excite - Starwars movie falls short of #1" ehehe. didn't win that whole "highest grossing film of all time" award.. whooohoo! beaten by Jurassic Park!..
"Star Wars: Episode 1 -- The Phantom Menace", one of the most widely anticipated movies in history, grossed about $61.8 million for the Friday-to-Sunday period, said its distributor, Twentieth Century Fox.
By contrast, "The Lost World" pulled in about $72 million during the Memorial Day holiday weekend of 1997. But with a tally of $102.7 million since opening last Wednesday, "Phantom Menace" handily eclipsed the "Lost World" five-day record of $98.8 million. It also broke "Lost World's" single day record of $26.1 million when it opened to $28.5 million.

"Starwars - Lightsabers" a technological breakdown of how a Light Saber should work, along with some misc. data.. its kinda cool.
 
May 27th
"CNN - Guerilla warfare on the internet" hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r hax0r

"Excite - Cell phone for prostitutes" What the fuck?.. you gotta read this.. im totally not shitting you.. the canadian government is going to buy Prostitutes Cellphones to insure their security, becuase in BC theres this pesky Prostitute Serial killer.. Now, if you look at this from my angle... you wont see a problem.. well, cept for the phone buying part.. see, its called a job risk. if you want to be a prostitute you have to understand that whole, 'getting killed by your clients' thing.. oh well.. who needs job security anyway these days?..
"CNN - y2k spooks people into the hills" wow.. I dont know what to say..... what kinda m0's are these people.. if they fear y2k this much, chances are they have no idea what it actually is.. "Oh look, something we dont understand, lets run from it and hide in those rocky hills, and wait till society comes to a screeching halt on january first 2000, cuz thats when the evil 200foot beast named y2k conquers the world.." god damn.. i hope they die of disentary or something.. That would be ironic.. So scared of technology, that they get killed by a 1000year old disease.
"eBay - ICQ #163896" Oh, god.. ICQ # FOR SALE! OMG!. oh wait.. i dont care.. :)..
Local mirror here
Sent in by: Loki

"C|Net - Mp3 wins royalty dispute" whoohoo! oh wait, i mean... Mp3's are bad, if you dont own the original CD/Tape/Vynil/8track/etc. :)..
The RIAA sought to increase the 6.5 percent rate established by the Library of Congress last year. The trade association at one point said it and its members should receive more than 40 percent of the revenue derived from sales of digital music.
Sent in by: The_Brain
"Starwars - Pants" heh. k, this is kinda funny, not really, but amusing to all those geeky Starwars fans out there. its a series of quotes from the starwars movies where some of the words have been replaced with 'pants' or other words to take the meaning right out of them :)..
Sent in by: Nite
 
May 26th
"Darwin Awards - Medical Reference" well, this is just the peice de la resitance (pardon muh french) and kinda added to the fox injury line up on tv last night.. "America's Scarriest Train wrecks" and "Biggest Morons caught on tape".. hehe. anyway. you get to use yer imagination, cuz there is no video tape to back this up with.. but if yer really sick, scroll down to the 'Scrotum self repair' section.. *Bleh*..
Sent in by: Papercut
"Mr.T vs. Darth Maul" mmmm. Mr.T.. Man.. i really miss the A-Team.. hrmph..
Sent in by: Dumbals
"Milk - Wheres your mustache?(jpeg)" more Starwars ep1 love.. in the form of a Milk add, now i dont know if this is actually gonna be a milk add, but if it is.. it would oym!
Local copy here
Sent in by: Das

"Spacious Dick(jpeg)" hehehe.. gotta love those pesky unforseen typo's that make the world easier to live with.. its almost freudian, cuz this chick needs a huge dick in her life.. :) check it..
Local copy here
"Hitachi researchers show new DRAM-like memory" a followup link, from a the past.. i forget the exact other link that this is referring to, but its in my archives somewhere :).. anyway, geeks enjoy..
"CNN - Dead Soldier commited Suicide with 26 stab wounds" More American bullshit from the media.. (well, its the media pointing it out).. but we all know, that if 'you' were gonna commit suicide, it would be; by stabbing yerself 26times.. wtf?. how stupid does the media think we are, this reminds me of all those Swatt raids, when the suspects, would 'commit suicide' when the swat team would enter the 'kill zone'.. oh well, who trusts the media these days anyway?
"MSNBC - Microsoft hires Linux spy team" heheh.. and to top it off, this is being reported from Microsofts news team.. i dunno.. I can't explain it.. but... it appears that Bill is still frightened of Linux.. and he should be.. but.. he's also a smart geek.. (course, 99% of real geeks are geniuses).. he's willing to wait and see what people like about linux, and adopt those properties into the next MSOS..
Ahhh.. nothing like a nice vacation.. im finally almost well rested.. although my brain is still swimming in a combination of Molson Export, and Jack Daniels.. but all is good. Oh, and I saw 'The Mummy' aswell. and its pretty funny.. think of it as a spruced up 'Army of Darkness'.. the humor is VERY similar, so, if you enjoyed AOD, you'll prolly like this, even though Brendan Fraiser is in it, (i'll never forgive him for co-starring with Pauly Shore in Encinoman..) so ya, everything should return to normal, and enjoy this HUGE update.
.Creator