"Consumers Reports - Guide to selecting a girlfriend"

Accessories - Often the potential girlfriends you see on the lot or in a tavern will be loaded with accessories, as the dealer gets a high markup on such items as large bosom, long legs, green eyes, etc. Other accessories will only appeal to fringe markets, such as models which come pre-equipped with children, or the ability run 10 miles while chanting sanskrit. In such cases you should make a list of accessories desired, tolerated, and disliked. Note that some accessories (such as children) can be added later, while others (such as a large bosom) should be factory installed.

"Maximum PC - Intel Dumps ATA"

The new interface, known as Serial ATA, pumps out 1.6Gbps contrasted to ATA/66 which is little over 0.5Gbs at maximum throughput. Serial ATA expects to scale to 6Gbps and will demo this fall. Expect to see it in desktops and entry-level RAID servers.
Apart from the speed increases, the most significant improvement is cable design. Serial ATA reduces the number of pins from the required 24 to four pins. The thinner cabling is expected to lower costs slightly, also.

"CNN - Police save goldfish from art-blender-death"

The creation by artist Marco Evaristti consisted of goldfish swimming inside regular kitchen-blenders. Exhibition visitors could switch on a blender, transforming the content to fish soup, the Ritzau news agency reported.

"Yahoo - Bill Gates' Property Taxes top $1M"

King County mailed out property tax bills Monday, and the biggest by far went to Microsoft co-founder Bill Gates, whose home and land in suburban Medina are valued at nearly $110 million.
That translates to a property tax bill of $1,076,231.
Gates' home and five acres on the Lake Washington waterfront nearly doubled in value last year, when Gates had to pay $615,000 in taxes based on an assessment before construction on the 48,000-square-foot house and grounds was completed.

"Life on ice - HotHeads"

Over the next few months Pazzo caught several of the animals and watched others in the wild. She calls the strange new species hotheaded naked ice borers. "They're repulsive," says Pazzo. Adults are about six inches long, weigh a few ounces, have a very high metabolic rate -- their body temperature is 110 degrees -- and live in labyrinthine tunnels carved in the ice.

"Wired - Gov't seeks pr0n experts"

The opportunities for ridicule were too much for some folks to resist. (Remember the Reagan-era Meese Commission mocked in Deep Throat 2?)
Thomas Lipscomb, chairman of the Center for the Digital Future and a member of another National Academy of Sciences panel, wrote, "I have some appropriate nominations."

"The Spark - The Bitch Test"

The results are in. You are certifiably:
51% bitch!
which is higher than the worldwide average 38%

"Quotes From Famous Drunks"

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
--Dean Martin